Анна Шиман
Draft translation. This text was translated automatically and has not been proofread yet — if something reads oddly, it does.
At today’s pace of life, personal boundaries are a topic everyone keeps hearing about. Whenever people interact, their boundaries meet in one way or another.
So what are boundaries, and why does it matter so much to build them?
Blurred boundaries are a tendency to get drawn into other people’s moods, attempts to control another person’s actions, emotions and wishes, a longing to merge with them completely.
Alongside this comes difficulty in recognising your own true wishes, feelings and goals.
Do I want this or not?
Is this what I need, or something else?
This is how an inability to separate your own Self, the core of your personality, from the influences and events of the outside world shows itself. The result is a broken balance between your own needs and other people’s.
A person lives other people’s lives and forgets about their own.
Weak boundaries also show in the urge to keep the “goodwill” of relatives, neighbours or colleagues at any cost. The price of that urge can be energy depletion, the loss of your own Self and what makes you unique.
So what are boundaries?
First of all, they are a clear understanding of your own needs and the ability to meet them. It is within our boundaries that we have a real ability to act. Beyond them we cannot answer for things, feel emotions or control events. We talk about boundaries and needs in detail on the foundation course “Practical Psychology”.
There are things we cannot influence. Simply accepting this fact is one of the stages of building boundaries.
- We have no power over a boss’s “petty tyranny”, a domineering partner’s behaviour or a friend’s negative emotions.
- We can act only within our own territory of feelings, energy and possibilities. Beyond that territory begins someone else’s domain
Why do we get drawn so easily into other people’s problems, relationships and lives in general?
Why is it sometimes so hard to say “no” to another person, and why does fear arise when we need to mark out how we allow ourselves to be treated?
At consultations with metaphorical associative cards in our centre, we will help you understand what boundaries are and how to build them well.
We will help you learn to do it calmly and confidently, to stand your ground with ease and to speak up about what matters.
Exploring life scripts with metaphorical associative cards, we will help you understand why your boundaries became blurred. Along the way you will meet the idea of a “hidden benefit” and see the hidden benefit you get from your situation.
We introduce everyone who is interested to the other possibilities of metaphorical associative cards on the course “The Metaphorical Universe”!
Metaphorical associative cards are a fascinating journey into your inner world, in which you can be both a participant in the process and its creator!
We look forward to seeing you at our consultations!
